I wanna be a prize winning drag queen
My triumphant return to work was better than expected. My positive spin on enjoying a job where I sit on my ass all day for 15 dollars an hour was supplemented with the sort of oddities you can only find in the shipping industry.
I took escalation calls regarding the availability of sending a pine box (see coffin) to Kazakstan, stipulations and restrictions on exporting sex toys to Sweden (you can't unless they are classified as a medical device; yes really) and helped price a 500lb espresso maker to Indonesia (like the muslims there REALLY need more caffinated products). I didn't get bored giving the same response and explanation as to how my vacation went and even my most sedated agents noticed the spring in my step.
From there, we flip-flop to drama, drama, drama. The 'x' has been accused by her friends of being on some sort of drugs (meth or coke to be specific). This intriguing revelation by her friends came after exhaustive research, where they quetioned pretty much everyone the 'x' knows about her dealings over the past two months. They grilled several 'experts' (i.e. known drug addicts), co-workers and casual acquatances up and down my desert oasis about the 'x's strange behavior over the past couple of months, and came to the only conclusion possible; that she and I are both strung out on drugs. Of course if they would have actually bothered to ask either she or I they could have gotten the truth. That truth being that her friends are a bunch of lunatics and selfish hose-beasts and she felt more comfortable confiding her new found feelings in someone with a brain who could actually offer up solutions and objective opinions instead of mindless ravings. So the reason for her odd behavior as of late? Shitfire, she is actually happy and her friends can't figure out why, hence, she is now a drug addict.
I would delve into this more and possibly rip those involved for the sheer dispaly of stupidity, but I have my own problems and frankly I just hate people.
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