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We Are All Totally Fucked or Speech & Debate 101

2004-10-01_xx_8:01 a.m.


I found myself cheering wildly, like an underage drunken college football fan everytime the challenger responded with a scathing riptose that caused the incumbent to fume and seethe in well trained silence.

I also groaned audibly anytime the redneck threw out his dopey smirk which is the one feature about his speaking persona that scares me shitless. Frankly, anytime he does that bad things tend to happen, like...oh I don't know...winning presidential elections and starting wars. He did a suprisingly good job fending off or dismissing most of the ground where they both dissagreed with almost coherent statements and facial expressions that said, "Oh come on now, I never said anything like that."

A couple of other minor observations:

- Kerry reminds me a lot of Al Gore in the way he handled the debate; no pomp, almost no humor and simply adequate enough not to make any major mistakes.
- Bush seemed much more at ease and made my mind hasten back to the days of Slick Willy. It pissed me off to no end that the man that ruined my country is so god damn charasmatic.
Speech and Debate 101 highlights aside and forget the fact that Kerry was constanly defending his flip-flops with a visible grimace and that Dubyah couldn't seem to string together more than 4 words at a time without "ummming" and "aaahhhhing". I say forget anything about who may have won this debate, who ended up with more egg on their face and which of them has the better ideas.

No matter the outcome of this next presidential election, we all lose. I can't believe I'm seriously pondering of voting for Ralph Nader for a second consecutive election. I think we might actually be better of playing a best 2 out of 3 of Trivial pursuit, twister or a good ole fashion game of spin the bottle.

I say spin the bottle because the winner could be president and would also get to make out in a closet and I thnk that would be totally cool.

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