See, This Is What Happens When You Piss Off Your God's; an open ended letter
To whom it may concern,
Far be it from me to be a naysayer of doom or a prophet of the apocalypse and despite my agnostic attitude and belief in non-believing, I�m going to say it anyway. Y�all have really, really pissed of your perspective almightiers.
Of course when I say �y�all� that doesn�t apply to one and all and in reality, is more of a finger pointing to the extremes of the respective fates that have had a harsh reminder handed to them as of late. The rest of us are sort of along for the ride and wondering what in the hell the �y�all�s� were thinking.
So let�s face it folks, whether or not you believe in the existence of an almighty omnipotent being ruling your fates; they are here to stay. Me, I am unbeliever, but smart enough to know that you can�t simply dismiss something because you don�t believe it to be true. It is a mute point whether or not I�m a believer or who is a believer. The big point I am attempting to make is that those of you who are honest to goodness god-fearing followers of faith and us that aren�t have some beef to settle.
In light of all the recent events that have reared their heads across the globe, some in our own backyards, the deities and denizens that make up your faith are trying to get a message to all of you believers and everyone seems to be missing the point. So as an unbiased third party, let me go ahead an offer up a translation in very simple terms to help get this situation rectified post haste; �your god is pissed, knock it off fuckers.�
And how, you might ask, is some foul-mouthed, geeky, son of a motherless goat suddenly the authority on signs from the heavens manifested on earth being not so subtle hints that each respected and worshiped god-like entity is severely frothing at the mouth angry? Simple; I pay attention and I�m not dead.
The biggest example I can start with to drive my point home is going to be this entire Tsunami thing. Tens of thousands of Muslims and Christians were wiped with one angelic stroke. Such a disaster of this epic of a proportion majorly affected two (2) separate and unrelated fates at the same time. This means that there would have to have been a collaborative effort on the parts of at least two (and possibly more depending on how many faiths in India you throw into the mix) beings of god like proportions to drop an earthquake and a tsunami on a part of the world that hasn�t had an experience like this since modern history has been recorded. So far there are 155,000 + people whose prayers went unanswered and you can bet your Koran or bible thumping asses that all these folks were praying to be paid. For crying out loud, the earth SHOOK on it�s axis as if a giant set of hands laid the smack down on your punk asses.
Ok, so one monstrous and awesome display of death and destruction not enough? How about a little bit of weather then, hmmm?
Alaska is soggy, not frozen, not snow bound, soggy. As in there are places that are supposed to be covered in snow that are not. In my own neck of the desert we had tornadoes race through yesterday, hail in my own backyard and the riverbed that is a couple of football fields away from my humble living space has water flowing through for the first time in seven years. California is once again saturated and sliding into the ocean and a coral reef was found off the cost of Texas in a place coral reefs ain�t supposed to be able to grow. If any of you weren�t in the country for the hellacious storm that crippled a good part of this great country prior to Xmas, I�ll throw that one out as a reminder to.
Wanna know what the shipping company I work for calls each and everyone of these natural disasters in its official lawyer laden fine print? Come on guess�
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ACTS OF GOD!
As I graciously step down from my pulpit (err soap box), my message to all of my (err I meant the) faithful is a simple one. Continue your religious beliefs and worship your icons. Per the teachings in each of your respected works of fictions (err I mean faiths) be kind to your fellow man, turn the other cheek and�umm�something about not banging your neighbor�s wife�? I for one am not going to pray to any god as it seems that anytime someone does so they end up making then news and being very, very dead.
So from all of us non-believers that simply would like to live out our lives as we choose and not have to worry about being caught up in a biblical maelstrom; please pay attention. Your god is pissed and while I�m not exactly certain what it is y�all have done to anger your god�s so, it seems that only those of you that have true faith in such things can set the world right again. Frankly, the rest of us are tired of dealing with all of your shit.
Thank you for your time,
Warmest regards,
The of Little Faith
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